Me name is Cornelius Smythe, though that isn’t goin’ to seem so god darn almighty important in the grand scheme of thin’s that I has to tell you about, and has to tell you I do. I hasn’t much time left, so payin’ close like attention will be servin’ you well indeed. You don’t and the fault will be on your head.
I am a traveler by trade and by word of those that knows me by the by. Knowed sometime as a master odd jobber though the talent came by way of necessity more than desire you see and be thinkin’ I be boastin’, which I’m not. Shoot and me lands, I have even been called thief on one occasion or two, but that don’t be true, you understand me, so don’t be believing those tales.
I have been to many distant and out of range places and I have seen many a wondrous sight with these tired old gray eyes. I have been in the court and presence of kings and I slept a night or more in the drafty stalls with animals and their like, sharing their hay, which I can tell you firsthand, are usually more well mannered than the former high noses. I tell you these thin’s so that you may weigh and sift the tale I am about to tell you against your own beliefs and values as you may call them to task before this tale is done.
Let me begin by sayin’ I am prone to exaggerate a bit around the edges till they be curlin’ their britches. Nay, even to tellin’ a lie when it suits me right kindly in them circumstances that calls for it. Better you should know and understand these thin’s now and in the front, than dismissin’ me tale later, because I has chosen to keep hidden me background and reputation from all scrutinizin’ tittle-tattle and tarnished eyes that seek out flaws in that which they don’t understand, or believe nor trust.
You may as well know as I do, that I have good reason to believe this tale be true, this bein’ because of somethin’ that happened to me. I will not tell you what that was just yet, as you would most likely dismiss it as the ravin’s of a lunatic, at least right now. Yes, at least right now me lads and lasses, but true it is. As true as I breathes this air and walks this earth and you can wager your last long boots on it.
Yes, and the other thin’ that you should know before I start me tale, is that I will be long dead before you finish readin’ this. Oh don’t you be frettin’ none on me account, thoughs I appreciates and warms with the concern you be feelin’. I even know when and how it will happen, praisin’ the saints. I must tell you privately, that I am a little afraid of dyin’ as I guess we all are, but after what I have seen and heard, it’s not the worst thin’ that could happen to a body. No sir, not the worst by a long shot or a stone’s toss away.
Anyway, I won’t be borin’ you with lots of particulars about me. As I said at the beginnin’, these thin’s really aren’t very important by any account. I believe though that you should know that what you sometimes see isn’t what it seems, nor is what you feel inside even your own, and I know that you may not be ready to believe this, but when you are, ha! There you go! You see your time here today is not really a sure thin’. It may not be your time at all, or the time it appears to be; don’t you know.
It all began one fine and misty warm autumn day, and I remember this point quite clearly even though some would have tell my reckonin’ ain’t what it was in younger days. Autumn, which you will be findin’ out later, is really called the Base Arc, is me favorite time of year.
Leaves that the trees have cast off dead and dyin’, crunch beneath me feet, lettin’ go with heavenly smells that belongs to them and them alone, though they let me nostrils share a whiff. The sounds they make as me boots crush them and stir them about, is comfortin’ in the deep forests that I tend to frequent these days by the by.
These aromas that gladden me nostrils are the scent of me childhood though that be seventy some odd years and maybe more past. A time ago I would run and jump into the largest piles of leaves that had just been painstakin’ly mustered by me neighbors, so long ago, so long.
So sad when I’s commence to muse on me time as a child. Yesterdays seem more pleasant when looked at through the gentle hands of time gone past and ago. These autumn days tilt me head in those directions more times than I should be allowin’, don’t you know.
Jumpin’ those leaf piles and smellin’ their scent. Ah, that would cause me once upon neighbors some fret and fuss, raisin’ their temperature a bit. Yes sir it would do that a certain it would, though there was no harm in me heart, just a youngster’s joy and fancy. But, this is neither here nor there, so let me tell you what happened to me this day, or began to happen beginnin’ this day, nor it did not end today, nor if I really think it through, did it actually start this day.
The tale started long before I was born, least I think it did. No, yes sir I’m sure of that much, I am. Now I knows that may sound a bit odd, but than this whole tale is a wee bit odd. At least I found it to be that way at first, though later it became even stranger. The lad convinced me after I come across several clues and, oh I forgot to tell you about the lad didn’t I? This happens more than I care to abide, causin’ me to nod a greetin’ to the age of these old bones.
Well, you see the lad cuts to the bleedin’ heart of this whole tale and I dare say that without him thin’s might have taken a slightly different wrinkle. A twist much different and odd from that which you or I would have liked, but than you won’t understand that will you? So I better be gettin’ on with this tale or else you will think me loony and you might not recommence to follow me tale. Now so you’s understandin’ me, that ain’t goin’ to be no sweat off me brow, cause remember or did I tell you yet, so confusin’ this movin’ back and forth.
I was walkin’ through the forest this one fine autumn day, listenin’ to the birds chirpin’ and singin’ me favorite melody. A gentle song known only to me and the sparrows bein’ me friends and companions. The little chipmunks and other like animals rummagin’ for treats here and there, not a care in the world had I, but oh how soon that changed.
Oh lord on mighty high. Don’t knows that I would not have run when I first saw him, and run fast as the devil be chasin’ me, if I knew what I knows now, or knew than or perhaps for a fleetin’ moment, didn’t want to knows at all.
Now, at first I saw him some distance off. Not good at guessin’ how far that might be, never seemed so right important and maybe it’s not anyhow. At first I was about to take flight, high tail it to some more sheltered parts of these woods. Well, you know how it is these days, never can tell who might want to rob you, not that I had a lot to pinch mind you. Well, somethin’s tells me to hold off on the hidin’ of myself in the brush and thickets. So I watched him come-on a mite bit closer. Oh but I’m bein’ pitifully nervous, don’t you know.
When I could see that he was only about fifty feet off or so, I chanced a look. Thans that I witnessed he was only a lad; not so as an especially big or straplin’ lad at that either. Now no lad of his size was likely to be a threat to me. I steps out of the shadow of the timber and calls out in his way. “Boy! Hello there, boy!”
Now I don’t know if he heard me, or if he thought I might be some kind of robber or thieve as I thought him to be. But plexed, he says nothin’ back to me greetin’. So I waits a little till he is almost passed by me and closer. I repeats. “Oh boy. Good day to you now.” I says to him, seemin’ a hairbreadth more friendly like.
The lad glared up at me, strange eyes he has by the way of it too and such, but still he says nothin’. A serious seemin’ lad he is to me way. No smile passed his lips, not even in the eye corners where they sometimes hide. To be seein’ someone friendly like out on the trail and not appreciating it caught me cuffs as a mite odd. He should be too, cause of the troubles in these parts, don’t you know.
Now I have heard a time or two of mutes and the dumb, and I figures that maybe this lad has the disease, and me not knowin’ sign. I stares at him perplexin’ what to do when he says just clear as a bell, “I’m going to Tellumade. Do you know how far it is?”
Well, I was taken back a mite; don’t you know. First off he can speak. Apparently he just ignored me greetin’, not very nice, no not very nice at all. Young lads, and I’m bein’ told lasses too, are not so mannerly these days anymore like when I was a youngen. This bein’ a shame or a lack of proper upbringin’, not likes when I be a child so long back and once upon a time.
I bein’ more respectful than the lad, chooses to ignore his rudeness and ill manners. I questions back to him. “Tellumade you say?”
Well, the lad puts his hands on his hips, glares at me a bit high and mighty like and sneerin’ says questioningly. “Well do you know or not?”
Well, taken back by his manner I was. I didn’t know exactly how to respond to such rudeness with a complete stranger. Me anger begettin’ the better of me, I responds angrily. “First off boy. A lad of your age should not be wanderin’ alone in these woods. All manner of trouble can wait along the trail, I knows this to be true enough. Second off. I knows these parts like me hand here, and I can tell you that there is no such place as you be callin’ Tellumade.”
The boy curled his lip, like you might when you’re fed up and put out and says to me. “Of course there is a Tellumade. I just came from there a short while ago and I have to get back. So you don’t know this area as well as you think you do old man.”
Now first he is rude, and now he goes off and calls me an old man. I tell you I like to take a stitch to his hide I would. But I cool off quickly, as is me manner don’t you know. “All right lad, fancy. If you just came from there, than why did you lose your way so easy?” I knew I had him there. I did for sure, grippin’ tight to the bone.
Again he goes and looks at me with that look like he has been suckin’ on lemons a day and says to me. “Well if you had traveled as far and long as I had, you might not ask such an asinine question.”
I was puzzled. I surely was. Lookin’ the fool too, cause may-be me ears been playin’ tricks with me. I asks him. “I thought you said that you just left there.”
He looks at me strange, like I’m daft and pronounces loudly. “I did.”
Didn’t I tells you he bein’ a rude one, so you shouldn’t be shocked at his mouth. Not likin’ it okay, me neither, but not shocked don’t you see. So I says back at him and myself gettin’ a bit testy too. “But you admits you just left a short spell ago and yet you traveled very far.”
He looks at me oddly, a question showin’ up in his eyes. “So what is your point?”
Now I was the one to be flustered, what’s me point indeed. Well just what might he be thinkin’ it is. I chooses myself to ignore this line of question. “Now look boy. I never heard of this place, what was it you called it anyway?”
“Tellumade,” he says.
“Yeah, well Tellumade. I can take you along with me a piece and help you look for it, but it surely doesn’t exist, don’t you know.”
He looked like he was goin to argue with me, but somethin’ stopped him short. Probably bein’ me good logic. I bein’ better mannered asks him anyway. “Which way do you suspects it is Lad?”
He looked around a mite gaugin his bearings and than points’ sort of to the West. “Maybe we should get started than Lad, as it be gettin’ on in the day,” I says.
He says, “That’s the best way to get somewhere.” A good point to him it is I will admit.
I says, “Well, yes it is. Yes it is at that.” I says again. “How will we know if we are there, if it ain’t really there at all.” Let him work on that a bit and chew it over.
He continues to looks at me like he be knowin’ all the answers. Says he. “If it ain’t there, we won’t get there, if it is, we won’t get there if we don’t start, and if we don’t start, it might not be there when we get there.”
“Double blasted talk.” Says I, bitin’ me lip till the blood almosts pours out and wavin’ me arms.
Well, me head was surely swimmin’ it surely was. I could tell right off this was a smart lad, it was. I thought about wragglin’ with him, but I knew that it wouldn’t do any good for me, but I just couldn’t help askin’ one last question of the lad. “If I don’t know where this place called Tellumade is, will I really be of help to you in findin’ it?”
Again that sickenin’ like look of disgust that covered his face so much. “Would I be standing here talking to you if I didn’t think so?”
As I said, he was smart, and that was difficult logic to take on. So off we went a searchin’, though I didn’t expects too much of this. What don’t exist, don’t, but you can see there ain’t much gain in arguin’ with the lad.
So presently and only with a little proddin’ on me part, he starts to talkin’ about this place Tellumade. And that’s how this tale began, for these are words, bein’ mostly of his mouth.
